Relationships scientists say that the honeymoon stage of a relationship lasts for about six months to two years. After that, the “druglike” hormones wear off and the couple of left trying to recapture the feelings they initially had. Or finding flaws they never noticed before.
Because of instances such as this, people are often hesitant to say a monogamous relationship can work. But if you are logical (even in the throes of unfettered love), you can make wise decisions on “who” to fall in love with–if your definition of falling in love is being together forever.
Dating experts outline seven match areas to consider:
1. Physical appearance
Face it. You aren’t going to be young, fit, and beautiful forever. And neither is your partner. Can you be with someone that won’t look as hot in twenty, ten, even two years? Don’t be afraid of feeling superficial. If those things are important to you then embrace them. Being realistic is better than being mean down the road when your partner has gained weight and isn’t attractive to you anymore.
2. Emotional maturity
Your partner may be the most exciting person to “party” with, but do they have a strained relationship with core people in their lives like family? Can they make what you consider to be “mature” life decisions? Everyone’s definition of emotional maturity is different, so consider yours. If the person you are in love with doesn’t fit that, there might be tension down the road.
3. Lifestyle choices
This includes career and social lives, common interests, leisure time activities and energy levels. Would she rather join the bowling league or the metropolitan symphony? Does he have lots of energy for activities with friends while she’d rather rest and chill out at home?
4. Financial compatibility
Most fights couples get into are about money. Maybe you love to live a lavish lifestyle, although paycheck-to-paycheck. Your partner is more of a saver. This is going to come back to bite you. Make sure you discuss important things like finances in detail, even going so far as creating “contracts” or “rules” so that no one feels bitter down the road.
5. Value structure
This area is often overlooked but has a tremendous impact on your life. It includes the big values: honesty, integrity, loyalty, views on family and children, religion and spirituality, life goals and the treatment and care for others. Does your mate follow through on promises made? Would you say this person is trustworthy? Will you always be there for each other in a pinch?
6. Marriage and intimacy
Some couples need to hang out all the time. Others are more comfortable being independent. If you are at opposition with your partner on this issues, it will definitely become an issue when your needs aren’t being met. Discuss these things early on and learn how to compromise. Or, alternately, if you aren’t willing to compromise, consider ending the relationship.
Having similar education levels increases your chances of sharing matching school and social experiences, intellectual interests and career goals. What topics do you and your honey like to talk about? Conversation limited to sports or shopping may get boring to someone who likes to ponder philosophy and bluster about business.
Of course, when it comes to love, sometimes you can help but be in difference with lots of these core issues. Just make sure you are realistic and live in the present and your relationship shouldn’t be too worse for the wear.
[Source: Yahoo! Match]